She Showed Me Her Ass And I Smacked It!

(I am so fucking wasted right now its unreal. Tune of the day is a well trippy numba by Ronin from the HedFuk crew. Wkd tune imo.)

Poker: Right this shit is fucked up. I've been on a bad one all day about how messed up my financial situation is so I been hitting the booze pritty hard. Got a phone call from the almighty leg end named Yorkshire Pudding. He explained the ins and outs of bankrupcy and helped me a lot. He's a really safe bloke too, thanks Pud, U R A Star!

After that I went back to Crypto and I still had $28 left. I put $10 on two tables each and manged to rince the lot. Went to BluSq and had $6.55 there. Rinced that in about 5 minutes. So now I have nothing at all. Decided to try and put £10 into Netteler and it worked so I put $20 into Crypto. Hahahahhahaha This is really fucking sick!

Multi tabled 15c/25c for a bit on 3 tables and trippled up on all 3. Took the advice that Kenn gave me (thanks mate!!!) and left all the tables and started again with just $10 on one 10 seater. Kenn you are a fucking ledgend mate! I was well well wasted by this time, its like 2am. And I'm only single tabling. I manage to turn $10 into $102 on a single table in an hour. Then I start thinking about what Cadmunky said. He reckons Crypto is really bad for suckouts at the lower levels, and I'm thinking fuckit I'll move up to the levels he plays on. (really wasted atm).

So I sit down for a single table sesh on 25p/50p. I've always been terrible at table selection and DrunkenMonk sat down at a table with £10 on a ten seater vs £80, £95, £60, £75, and £185. I made a few quid with some solid poker but Jesus Christ this was siiiick! The girl with £185 raises my J10s to £2 utg. I'm in late pos and there's no way I can refuse a bet like that. She obviously aint got a very strong hand coz there's no way you would play it like that utg on a stack like that. And I reckon she must have been bullying these boys for a while before I got here. All fold down to me and I make it £8 to go. (this is really sick) She flat calls and flop comes 5810 rainbow. I'm actually quite worried now coz I never put her on a good hand but she could have easilly hit something here. (maybe trip 5s). She puts £5 in and I aint cuntin around so make it £10 to see what shes holdin. She flat calls me and turn is a J. She bets £5 and I insta-jam. River is a Monk rag and she flips over A10. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! £50 pot to me! I cuntinue to rince this bitches stack(she left with 11 quid lol) and all the other cunts on the table and now have a wopping $244 in my Crypto acc. I started with $20 ffs. Get In There!!!

Put It In Cyder!!!

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Hang on a minute. How fucking shit faced am I now and was I then? Totally and utterly! One for the DrunkenMonk I belive.

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Its 8am now and I am still knocking back the Cyder. Went to Crypto to see if this really was true, and Yes! I turned $20 into $244.42 in the space of 2 hours. Nice!!! The DrunkenMonk staggers on!!!!! Probably going to have one off the wrist now.