Wednesday, 9 May 2007

Get In There!!!





(Tune of the day is called Love You Long Time by the almighty Ely Muff. Need I say more? Long intro so have some patience you slags this tune is asbolutely sick!!!)

My dreadlock mate came round lastnight. She aint got dreads anymore but we had a wicked time. I'll say no more.

Had a major stroke of luck today (twice?) On the way to the offee I noticed the advice people were in town for their once monthly visit. I aint gona be able to make my minimum payments tomorow so went in for some debt counciling.

This guy was really kool. Knew exactly what he was talking about and said I could easilly get bankruptcy, and actually thought it was a good idea. Basically I need to open a new bank account so I can get my wages and pay my rent. When I go bankrupt I should be able to keep this acc. open coz these days everything is automated and you cant get your wages in cash anymore.

My biggest concern was loosing or having to move out all my sound equipment, and not being able to play online poker anymore. He said cancel all dd's and standing orders right now and fuck both banks right off. "Dont pay them another single fucking penny" his words. Maybe he was relating to the Cyder stench off my breath. As I said, kool bloke. He reckons they cant send the bailiffs round coz I've never had a ccj. By the time they get a warrant I'll be bankrupt anyway. Fucking Nice One!!! I get to keep everything I Monked on. Yeah baby!

Even better. He said I can still keep my phone and internet connection coz they are both vital forms of communication. That means I can keep poking. The DrunkenMonk staggers on!!! (fuckin loving tune of the day right now)

For some strange reason one of my bank acc.s alows me virtually unlimited cash withdrawals (something I actually complained about not long ago). ############# ########## ############ ############. ################## ######## #### ###### # I'll have a quick one off the wrist before buying more Cyder. Hows that for fucking bankroll management?

Card Board City Here I Come! (got some mates there who totally rock.(something to do with their medication))

Poker: Only played a couple hours last night coz I had to tidy up the flat before me tree spirit princess came round.(Me love you long time. Tune of the day still flat out) Dont know where my brain was at coz I put $20 into BluSq when I'm getting 40% rakeback on Crypto. Anyway, got dealt 66 in late po (10c/20c) and recklessly called a $2 raise to go hu. Flop 643 rainbow. Ha Ha! I'm puting this guy on AK QQ or JJ. He makes a cuntinuation bet of $2. I call. Turn J. He makes it $5? Now I put him on overpair, not JJ and jam. He calls. River 7. He shows fucking 55! Jesus fucking Christ you fucking tit wank! Cleaned me out completely.

Took me a bit to reload (ouch I really couldnt afford that) and went back to the same table to take out this filthy stinking fish. I told him "You got lucky that time mate" and he said "Its always dangerous to slow play" I jammed on the fucking turn you CUNT! Anyway I got my money back off the slag and someone else knocked him out. Not sure what my acc. bal is right now but I have some thing to play with so its time to read some blogs and hit the tables. Oh and if anyone has any good advice on how to rince out a bank acc. b4 they go bankrupt I would love to hear it.

Good luck me bredrins and Put It In Cyder! WestCuntry Style AIII!

9 comments:

Yorkshire Pudding said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
DrunkenMonk said...

Thanks mate. I'll send you my email addee.

DrunkenMonk said...

Deleted your comment to hide your email address. Cheers Pud!

DrunkenMonk said...

Maybe I'll just do the Crypto thing and keep the rest in cash next to my baseball bat.

Amatay said...

ahaahahhahahahha LEGDE!

GWC said...

Dude,
whats your name on Crypto and what stakes do you play?

DrunkenMonk said...

My name on Crypto is GoldnMonk and I have the picture of the Jesus can of Strongbow Super. The stakes I play varies quite a lot. It depends on how drunk I am. Usually I start on 15c/25c and work my way up to $2/$5 where I usually blow my whole stack coz I is well passed the 3 litre mark by then.
What's your stakes & name on Crypto Bud?

Kenn said...

Monk i hope you screw the living shite out of those banks man - espevially if they cant get it back off you!!!

maybe i should think of this as well!!

GWC said...

Mines simply "cadmunkey" with a picture of a cartoon monkey face.
Usually find me at the £NL25 or £NL50 tables on there.
The microstakes are a bloody nightmare on crypto - the fish chase ANY draw no matter how weak it is, so good luck sir!!